Don't google "changing room" in search of a funny picture to start a blog off with because all you'll get is porn. However, if you want porn, here's your helpful tip for the day.
Well, last week Bry, Lia and I all traveled to Eureka, shortly followed by Sarah and Evie, in order to help me try on dresses. My all time favorite was this beauty:
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| Those fake jewels were pretty heavy. |
It was known as the Titanic Dress. I didn't end up buying any but I did end up taking a giant blow to the ego that day. As it turns out, I've got a dress type. Every dress I buy myself has the same shape.
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| Exhibit A |
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| Exhibit B |
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| Exhibit C |
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| Exhibit D |
Tight on top and flows on the bottom. A-line, to be stuck up like ALIA KENLOCK STAR FIX. I had to. Anyway, the point is that I never really understood my awkward proportions. I wear a size four in dresses if I buy my usual style of dress. When I went dress shopping in Old Town I went out of my comfort zone and tried whatever they had in "my size". I informed the sales lady that I wear a size four, we gathered as many as we could find and then I went to the dressing room to wow my crowd.
Flash forward a matter of minutes and I was beginning to face several harsh realities at once. As it turns out, I am a four on top and an eight or ten around the hips. With several dresses I was literally incapable of getting the dresses down over my hips. Who are these dresses designed for??? How do they expect someone to be shaped like this? To be fair, I'm shaped like this:
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| My Chinese professor took this of us at the Moon Festival earlier this month. |
Take a look at that picture. I did a bit of a double take. That's not an angle I see myself from... ever. Small chest, pencil thin arms, thin waist and an HUGE ass. Look at it! I double in size right there. No wonder the damn dresses wouldn't fit. I am doomed to wear one kind of dress for the rest of my life.
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